No more heartbreaks! Train yourself to recognise red flags this Valentine’s week

Falling in love is a glorious, dizzying plunge. But sometimes, amidst the fireworks, blind spots emerge. We ignore warning signs, dismiss inconsistencies, and end up tripping over hidden red flags, leaving our hearts bruised and battered.

So, how do we navigate this emotional terrain with awareness, protecting ourselves from unnecessary heartache? Recognising red flags in a relationship is a skill that can spare us from unnecessary pain and disappointment.

According to Anu Rajgarhia, psychologist, Mpower, it all begins with self-reflection. “Understand your own values, goals and personal boundaries. In this way, you can know when someone is portraying values and goals significantly different from yours or if they have no respect for your boundaries,” she tells indianexpress.com in an interaction.

There are some other ways too when it comes to training your heart to spot the landmines of love:

Communication is key, but watch for manipulation

Open and honest communication is the lifeblood of any healthy relationship. However, beware of partners who twist arguments, gaslight you, or guilt-trip you into sacrificing your needs. Healthy communication involves listening, respecting different viewpoints, and finding solutions together.

Watch for unhealthy possessiveness and jealousy.

A sprinkle of jealousy can be flattering, but suffocating possessiveness is a major red flag. If your partner tries to control your social life, monitor your activities, or isolate you from loved ones, it’s a sign of controlling behavior that can quickly turn toxic.

Actions speak louder than words.

Pay attention to inconsistencies. Grand promises and romantic gestures are lovely, but watch for inconsistency between their words and actions. Does their behavior consistently support their declarations? If their actions paint a different picture, listen to that discrepancy.

Reading and being informed about healthy relationships and red flags can help spot them when they show themselves in your interactions. (Source: Freepik)

Beware of red flags disguised as “red herrings.”

Sometimes, we confuse genuine quirks with red flags. For example, someone with a reserved personality might not be expressive with love, but that doesn’t necessarily mean they lack affection. However, if their reservedness manifests as emotional unavailability or lack of communication, then it’s a cause for concern.

Be informed

Reading and being informed about healthy relationships and red flags can help spot them when they show themselves in your interactions.

Trust your intuition

Trusting your intuition and speaking to a trusted adult can help you see things that you otherwise may not identify as a red flag.

Some disagreements can be okay

Of course, when two people enter a relationship it takes a while to understand each other. Disagreements are a part of any relationship. Every disagreement is not a red flag. Commitment to work towards building a healthy partnership is essential.

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