Intimacy after childbirth: Expert-approved strategies to help

Giving birth to a new life is a cherished experience in a couple’s life. It brings an abundance of joy and the possibility for both parents to look forward to a more fulfilled future together with their child. 

However, amid all the celebrations and excitement, there are many issues faced by mothers that often go unspoken. Pregnancy is the announcement of a new reality for women, which brings about a lot of challenges not just physically, but also emotionally and mentally. 

One such challenge is the struggle to be intimate postpartum. Bollywood actor Kalki Kaoechlin confirmed in an interview that it took her a while to get intimate with her partner again. “If you’ve had a vaginal birth, your body’s gone through trauma,” she said. 

Kaoechlin compared it to an injury or a fracture that takes time to heal itself, adding that there’s a psychological aspect too, wherein women can develop a fear of intimacy. 

In an interview with indianexpress.com, Dr Chetna Jain, director, Department of Obstetrics and Gynecology Cloudnine Group of Hospitals, revealed how childbirth can impact women’s perception of their body and how to emerge feeling confident again. 

How do physiological changes during and after childbirth impact a woman’s perception of her body and her intimacy with her partner?

Physiological changes during and after childbirth, according to Dr Jain, can have a significant impact on a woman’s perception of her body and her intimacy with her partner. These changes can manifest in many ways:

Body image

Pregnancy and childbirth can lead to significant changes like weight gain, stretch marks, and changes in breast size and shape. These changes may cause some women to feel less confident about their bodies, especially if they perceive these changes as undesirable. Negative body image can affect self-esteem and confidence, potentially leading to feelings of self-consciousness during intimate moments.

Physical discomfort

Childbirth can cause physical discomfort and pain, and the recovery period can be challenging. Women may experience soreness, fatigue, and hormonal fluctuations, all of which can impact their desire for intimacy.

Hormonal changes

Hormonal fluctuations during pregnancy and postpartum can affect mood and libido. Women experience a decrease in libido due to hormonal changes and exhaustion from caring for a newborn. These can decrease the desire for physical intimacy.

Breastfeeding 

Lower levels of hormones associated with lactation decrease libido and vaginal lubrication, impacting sexual satisfaction and intimacy.

Emotional changes

Pregnancy and childbirth bring about a range of emotions, including joy, anxiety, and stress. These emotional changes can influence a woman’s perception of herself and her relationship with her partner, affecting intimacy.

Role changes

The arrival of a new baby causes changes in a couple’s relationship dynamics. Childcare responsibilities and changes in sleep patterns cause tiredness and affect a couple’s ability to connect emotionally and physically.

Women may experience soreness, fatigue, and hormonal fluctuations, all of which can impact their desire for intimacy. (Source: Freepik)

Some practical strategies or exercises that can help women regain confidence

To regain confidence in your body and reconnect with your partners intimately after giving birth, Dr Jain shared the following tips: 

• Self-compassion practices: Encourage women to practice self-compassion and embrace their postpartum bodies with kindness and acceptance.
• Open communication: Foster open and honest communication between partners about desires, concerns, and needs related to intimacy postpartum.
• Gradual reintroduction to intimacy: Suggest starting with non-sexual forms of intimacy, such as cuddling, kissing, and holding hands, before gradually reintroducing sexual activity.
• Pelvic floor exercises: Recommend pelvic floor exercises, such as Kegels, to help strengthen pelvic muscles and improve vaginal tone, which can enhance comfort during intercourse. The use of lubricants to prevent dryness during penetrative sex will help.
• Seek professional support: Encourage women to seek support from healthcare providers or therapists who specialise in postpartum issues, including sexual health and body image concerns.
• Body-positive affirmations: Encourage women to practice positive affirmations and focus on the strengths and abilities of their postpartum bodies.
• Self-care: Suggest engaging in self-care activities that promote relaxation and self-confidence, such as taking warm baths, getting massages, or practicing mindfulness meditation.
• Explore new forms of intimacy: Encourage couples to explore alternative forms of intimacy that focus on pleasure and connection without the pressure of penetrative sex, said Dr Jain. 
• Patience and understanding: Remind couples to be patient and understanding with each other as they navigate the challenges of intimacy postpartum. They should first prioritise emotional connection and then move to physical contact.

Disclaimer: The copyright of this article belongs to the original author. Reposting this article is solely for the purpose of information dissemination and does not constitute any investment advice. If there is any infringement, please contact us immediately. We will make corrections or deletions as necessary. Thank you.