A R Rahman shared how his mom helped him deal with suicidal thoughts; you can help your loved ones too

During a recent event, musician A R Rahman shared his insights into spirituality and mental health. The celebrated music composer disclosed that he grappled with suicidal thoughts during his youth. It was the counsel of his late mother, Kareema Begum, that ultimately guided him through those challenging moments.

While addressing a gathering of Oxford Union Debating Society students, Rahman said, “When I had suicidal thoughts when I was young, my mother used to say, ‘When you live for others, you won’t get these thoughts’. That’s one of the most beautiful advice I got from my mother. When you live for others, and you’re not selfish, there’s a meaning to your life. I took it very seriously, whether you’re composing for somebody, writing for something, buying food for a person who can’t afford it, or you just smile at someone, these are the things that keep us going.”

Dr Ankita Priydarshini, consultant psychiatrist and behavioural medicine specialist, and founder and clinical head of Thriving Minds, Dehradun, explained that addressing a loved one’s potential suicidal tendencies or severe depression requires a delicate and compassionate approach. “Understanding the gravity of the situation, intervention, and support play pivotal roles in helping individuals navigate these challenging times,” she told indianexpress.com during an interaction.

Mental health is critical, and hobbies such as exercise, painting, writing, and talking with friends can all help.

Here’s how you can help.

I. Firstly, it’s crucial to recognise the signs of depression and suicidal thoughts. Changes in behaviour, withdrawal from social activities, mood swings, expressions of hopelessness, and a decline in personal hygiene can be indicative. If you notice these signs, initiate an open and non-judgmental conversation. Express concern, emphasising your willingness to listen and support without passing judgment.

II. Encourage professional help. A mental health professional, such as a psychiatrist or therapist, can provide the necessary guidance and interventions. Offer to assist in finding suitable healthcare providers and accompany your loved one to appointments, demonstrating solidarity in their journey to recovery.

III. In times of crisis, establish a safety plan. Collaborate with your loved one to create a plan outlining coping strategies, emergency contacts, and steps to take if suicidal thoughts intensify. This plan can serve as a tangible resource during moments of despair.

IV. Maintain open communication. Regularly check in on their emotional well-being, fostering an environment where they feel comfortable sharing their struggles. Acknowledge their emotions without trying to fix everything, emphasising empathy and understanding.

V. Encourage a support system. Building a network of friends, family, or support groups can provide additional resources for your loved one. Social connections play a vital role in combating isolation, a common challenge for individuals dealing with depression.

VI. Educate yourself about mental health. Understanding the complexities of depression and suicidal tendencies equips you with the knowledge to offer informed support. This knowledge also reduces the stigma surrounding mental health, promoting a more empathetic and compassionate perspective.

VII. Be patient. Recovery is a gradual process, and setbacks may occur. Patience, persistence, and unconditional support are essential. Celebrate small victories and encourage progress, fostering a sense of accomplishment and motivation.

VIII. In emergencies, don’t hesitate to seek immediate professional assistance or contact crisis hotlines. Recognising the urgency of the situation is crucial for prompt intervention.

IX. Lastly, prioritise self-care. Supporting a loved one with severe depression or suicidal tendencies can be emotionally draining. Taking care of your mental health ensures you’re better equipped to provide ongoing support.

Addressing suicidal tendencies or severe depression in a loved one requires a multifaceted approach encompassing empathy, professional help, open communication, and ongoing support. Collaboratively navigating this journey can foster resilience and contribute to the individual’s overall well-being.

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