When Sharmila Tagore revealed she changed her name, religion to marry Tiger Pataudi; expert shares ways to manage big changes in life

Sharmila Tagore’s marriage to Mansoor Ali Khan Pataudi was a groundbreaking union in India, defying societal norms at the time. The couple met and fell in love while Tagore was pursuing her acting career. Despite facing opposition and death threats, they persevered and formalised their relationship through marriage.

Tagore embraced Islam, adopting the name Ayesha, as a symbol of her commitment to the relationship. In an interview with Simi Garewal, Tagore recalled the challenges they faced during their courtship, “It wasn’t easy nor was it very difficult. It had to be faced and understood. You couldn’t be very flippant about it. Before that, I wasn’t terribly religious. Now, I think I know more about Hinduism and Islam.” When asked about her name Ayesha, Mansoor said that he suggested the name.

The couple faced significant backlash, including death threats, leading to concerns for their safety, Sharmila had revealed in a previous conversation with Barkha Dutt. “In Kolkata, when I was getting married, my parents were getting telegrams saying that bullets shall speak. And Tiger’s family was also getting… they were getting a little worried.” Sharmila shared that the wedding and the reception were managed and “nothing untoward happened.”

Ensuring that you talk about it with people whom you trust and who are likely to understand and empathise with your point of view (file)

Dr Kedar Tilwe, Consultant Psychiatrist, Fortis Hospital, Mulund & Hiranandani Hospital, Vashi, explained how preparing for life transitions such as Sharmila’s is an essential part of how we cope with the stresses that we face in day-to-day life.

“Making a pro and con list, talking with your trusted confidence, and ensuring that you have a support system in place will usually help you handle life transitions and changes in responsibilities if they arise,” Dr Tilwe advised.

One must also have a solution-oriented approach to perceived problems and figuring out if there are ways of coping better with situations that may turn problematic late, he told indianexpress.com.

Ensuring that you talk about it with people whom you trust and are likely to understand and empathise with your point of view, or reaching out to a trusted professional will enable you to handle such transitions better and would also give you a much-needed, different, and practical perspective on how to handle them.

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