Jaya Bachchan row highlights how married women who retain maiden names navigate identity, tradition, and choice

When Samajwadi Party MP Jaya Bachchan objected to being referred to as ‘Jaya Amitabh Bachchan’ by the Speaker in Parliament, it ignited a much-needed debate about women adding their husbands’ surnames after marriage.

While Bachchan’s case is complex given that she chose to adopt her superstar spouse’s surname, the incident put the spotlight on the evolving attitudes towards the tradition of women choosing not to do so and the impact on their identities in modern Indian society.

Jaya Bacchan, once again tried to be oversmart and show her arrogance over using “Amitabh” in her name, this time VP saheb himself was on chair, schooled her properly… pic.twitter.com/k791uzw2mc

— Mr Sinha (@MrSinha_) August 5, 2024

Why women choose to retain their maiden name

For many women, retaining their maiden name is a matter of preserving their identity and professional reputation. Srinidhi G Krishnan, who chose not to change her name after marriage, explains, “I don’t really believe that my relation or equation with my father, whose name is my last name, should change just because I got married. For me, taking on a different name does not necessarily indicate a shift in my life.”

The decision often stems from practical considerations as well. Saraswathi Anand cites the “cumbersome” process of changing legal documents as a key factor in her choice. “I saw the entire rigmarole that my friends went through, legalities and changing the name in the passport, in the driver’s licence. I just found that too cumbersome and I did not see what value addition changing my name was bringing into my life,” says Anand.

Legal experts confirm that Indian law supports a woman’s right to keep her maiden name. Meghna Mishra, senior partner at Delhi-based litigation firm Karanjawala & Co., states, “In India, sharing a surname typically reflects a sense of family unity and adheres to traditional customs. However, women have the legal right to keep their maiden names after marriage and are not required to adopt their husband’s surname.”

Dr Anagh Mishra, an advocate on record at the Supreme Court, adds, “The Indian legal system recognises a woman’s right to maintain her identity, which includes her name, after marriage.”

Shreya Sharma, lawyer and founder of legal aggregator platform Rest The Case, advises, “While legal recognition of her maiden name is assured, maintaining uniformity across documents is crucial for smooth interactions with institutions and during various bureaucratic processes.”

For some women, keeping their maiden name is an act of empowerment. Shyamala Krishnan, who retained her name after her first and second marriages, reflects, “I think subconsciously, you know, my name was empowering. Because I vividly remember sitting in the family court in Bombay (during court proceedings to end the first marriage)… I think I was driving my strength out of my name. So, I really did not want to change my name (after my second marriage) and sort of lose the power.”

For some women, keeping their maiden name is an act of empowerment. (Source: Freepik)

The challenges

However, keeping one’s maiden name is not always met with universal acceptance. Many women face pressure from family members or societal expectations. Krutika Sejpal says people would often assume she had changed her name, writing ‘Krutika Gattani’ without asking. “The question was not if I have changed my name….it was, ‘you will definitely change your name’, she adds.

Rashmi Ambastha also shares an incident that took place at the driver’s licence office. “My husband and I got married young, so we learned driving together and went to get our licences at the same time. At the office, we were in the same queue. My husband went first, completing his biometrics and paperwork. When it was my turn, the lady helping us became very excited. She told me she had ‘done something for me’ — she had changed my name on the licence to include my husband’s surname, without my request or consent. I was surprised and upset because I had not provided any ID with my husband’s name,” she recalls.

Dr Shilpi Saraswat, clinical psychologist at Sakra World Hospital Bengaluru, explains the psychological impact. She says, “Women are always judged by society on the basis of their name. They are always in fear and doubt whether they will be accepted by society and their family.” Saraswat says it is not easy for women who don’t want to adopt their husbands’ names. “She is always looking for validation and there is so much confusion about her feelings and thoughts about choosing the right identity,” she says.

Neha Parashar, consultant clinical psychologist and relationship expert at Cadabam’s Mindtalk, adds, “Choosing to keep one’s name after marriage can trigger a range of emotions. On one hand, there is a sense of empowerment and self-affirmation, a declaration of independence and agency. But on the other hand, this defiance can lead to a sense of isolation, judgment, and even guilt.”

Absy Sam mentions how she experienced resistance from her in-laws because of her decision. “My partner’s parents were keen on getting my name changed as they run a family business. But I wanted to have my private practice and decided not to change my surname. So, yes, in terms of a lot of things, there has been a lot of resistance,” she tells indianexpress.com.

In India, Dr Saraswat explains, the expectation of women taking their husbands’ names is rooted in historical, cultural and social factors. “We live in a patriarchal society where men hold authority and power over women. This has resulted in the expectations that women will adopt the husband’s name as a symbol of receptiveness and loyalty,” she says.

In cases of divorce or widowhood, Dr Mishra elaborates, “While there is no specific legislation governing surname changes after divorce or widowhood, the process is facilitated through legal mechanisms related to name changes.” Sharma adds, “For reverting to a maiden name after divorce, a woman should update her legal documents to reflect her maiden name, typically using a copy of the divorce decree and an affidavit declaring the change.”

The naming of children when mothers retain their maiden names is another area of consideration. Dr Geetanjali Srikantan, associate professor at BITS Law School, notes, “There is no bar on children carrying the mother’s maiden name and it has been ruled by the Delhi High Court that a child has the right to use his or her mother’s surname.”

Strategies to cope with pressure

To cope with societal and familial pressures, Sohini Rohra, a mental health advocate, suggests several strategies. “Having honest discussions with their partner and family members about their decision can foster understanding and support. Building a strong support network of like-minded individuals, friends, or support groups can provide emotional backing and reduce feelings of isolation,” says Rohra.

Despite the challenges, many women find support from their partners. Srinidhi shares, “My husband was okay with it and my family was okay with me not changing my name.” This support can be crucial in navigating familial and societal expectations.

Looking forward, many of the interviewees believe that change needs to start with women themselves. Shyamala Krishnan argues, “First and foremost, I think our perception of ourselves has to come from a place of strength. You know, we as women need to sort of be the first ones to move to build that confidence among ourselves.”

Sejpal adds that women supporting other women is crucial. “I have seen very closely that women themselves do not support other women. And if they start doing that, I guess men do not have the energy to fight for these kinds of things,” she says.

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